On that week we were learning in class to grow from our challengers. To learn from them. To respect them and to not hold them in a place of anger.
Boy was I ready to go out and practice it too! Although, maybe creator was listening to me too closely when I excitedly said I was ready for the challenge.
On a friday afternoon I was set up at my little card table outside of the entrance to Safeway. As I like to say I, in the most cordial way possible, pestered every individual who walked through the doors asking, "Is your voter registration up to date?" And always asking how their day was, or just simply saying hello.
Most individuals are an easy judge of character. Either they are interested or they are not. You can feel the vibe and I like to think I'm pretty good at judging whether I should ask a followup question of whether they would be interested in a free, non- partisan voters guide or would like to register for an absentee ballot.
This particular day was; in sum, bizarre.
In an earlier post I talked about how I registered an ex-felon for the first time. By this time in my experience working for Montana Women Vote I had registered multiple ex-felons as well as a few homeless individuals. Some of which fell in both categories.
In the shift before mine, my mentor- Jan Strout was telling me how she did just that thing only an hour before I came to relieve her. When we accomplish something like this, we see it as an achievement and something to be celebrated and the individuals should commended for their efforts.
On my shift this day; however, I did not encounter this.
But I did encounter, and came to find out in the last sentence this man said to me, that he was a cop.
This is what happened.
As he was walking into the building I greeted him the same way as I had done to every other individual. He was tall, with short silver hair and wearing a black leather jacket. I'm saying this because usually it's not the hardest to pin point why an individual says that they can't register to vote. In any case, when he hurriedly said that he could not vote because he was a felon, I said "Okay, well what would you say if I told you that in Montana you can register to vote?" The man responded by saying that he would talk to me on his way out.
I happened to catch his eye as he was leaving and he made a bee line towards me.
He kept asking how it was possible and I continued to hand him pamphlet after pamphlet explaining the rights of ex-felons in Montana. After he seemed satisfied and I once again asked him if he would like to register to vote, he quickly turned on his heels and stated matter-of-factly, "I'm a cop, thanks though."
I was pretty upset to be honest.
In a way, I felt played. Played out of my time to potentially reach out to other individuals who were walking into Safeway. Played out of my credibility as a person who is actually trying to help an ex-fellon, not belittle them. I also felt disappointed in the man. I was shocked that he was unaware of this clause saying that ex-felons were allowed to vote here in the state of Montana. I expect the average citizen on the street to not recognize the existence of it but a cop? Come on.
Anyways. That was just the start of my day.
The hard part was to come at the end of my shift.
Again, there was a man walking through the doors of Safeway. And once again, I greeted this man the way I greet every individual, with a smile and honest interest in the person. The man did not seem to be interested and continued on his way.
However, as he walked out and I nicely said to him, "have a good day sir," he made his way towards my table. He quickly started shooting me questions about the organization and what we were doing. I responded by telling him that we were a non-profit organization canvassing the local area to register individuals to vote.
He responded by saying, "But I am not a woman, why did you ask me in the first place."
I told him that although our name is "Montana Woman Vote" we are here for anyone and everyone. I explained to him how our focus was to educate and mobilize low-income women and their allies to participate in the democratic process as informed voters, policy advocates, and leaders within the community.
Then came the harassment.
The man started asking me why we are pushing women to become engaged.
I cooly responded it was because there are many issues regarding the rights of women especially when it came to reproductive health care that are on the chopping block in the ballot initiatives this year.
He then started shooting me question after question, trying to get me to point fingers and name individuals and parties. Asking why I thought he as a tax payer should be paying for a teenagers, and I quote, "fuck up." Why it was him who should be paying nine dollars for birth control. -For the record, it's about three times that amount for the average teen to get birth control.
I continued to say that I was simply out to get the vote and by no means to point fingers or to push my political views on anyone else.
But the man wouldn't stop.
He continued to harass me trying to pull out words that knew would upset him. He started saying things like, "you might want to learn a thing or two before you go out preaching about shit you don't know." and "sounds like you need to get your facts straight."
By this time I had shut down. I am not one to give up on a fight, especially when it is something I believe in, but I knew there was no winning or even compromise with this man.
Yet, he continued to belittle, attack, talk down, and stand over me. He would not stop trying to pry out words that I knew would only make him more upset.
Never did I talk down about a party. Never did I say anything bad about a specific politician.
Ultimately, I stopped talking. Partly because I had nothing to say, partly because I was doing my best to hold back the soon to come tears. And let me point out, i'm not one to cry.
It was at this point that he started asking for names and numbers. My supervisor and our branch...yada yada yada. I was happy to give it to him because I knew he would soon be on his way and I also knew that I didn't do a single thing wrong.
Finally he, oddly enough, wished me a good day and turned away.
I had about five more minutes left of my shift and was the last one for the day so I packed up all of my papers, table, and chairs and rushed over to by boss's house.
I broke down almost immediately. She could tell there was something wrong and as I sputtered out the events she couldn't believe it.
After I had calmed down a little we talked it out.
We talked about how she has run into individuals with the same motives as this man; to belittle, degrade, and talk down to women. His motive was not to learn about the organization, it was to stomp on it and myself.
I learned quite a lot from this experience. I recognize that not all individuals are open to social change, even a change that has been around for a few decades now. I recognize that not all are happy about young people, young women, becoming involved in things that matter. Becoming involved in the white man's world. I also recognize that there are, and will always be people who will remain stuck in their ways. Its the way one chooses to react to that person that may make a difference.
As a result of this day, Safeway forbade our organization from ever coming to work there again, thanks to his frivolous complaint. My boss told me that she encouraged the Safeway CEO to further investigate the man who complained. It may give her some insight to the events.
I also made some decisions that day. I decided that it is my job, and my right to be out doing the kind of work I am doing. This day did not stop me in the slightest bit, rather, it further propelled me with a newfound passion and sense of meaning. He did not do what he came there that day to do- to stop me in my tracks. I would be lying if I said I wasn't traumatized or hurt. Because I sure was. But it made me value my rights and my privileges and to stand up for what I believe in. No matter how hard the hits may be.